L.A. marathon expo

The L.A. marathon expo was yesterday (and today), but I went yesterday. I wouldn't have gone, except I was in the neighborhood, and I had big plans for snagging some samples.

I also thought I'd pick up the bibs for my friends who were running it. Last year, they didn't ask for my ID. This year, they needed IDs for the runners, so the best-laid (and worst-laid) plans of mice and moms just didn't work out.

Girl Scout cookie sales are officially over for our troop, and that's a good thing, as I was starting to lose it. Yesterday, I forgot my wallet -- which never happens, and I let my phone run out of charge. Both of those screw-ups nearly caused big troubles. Next week should go better, as I'm no longer committed to helping sell the stupid cookies.

Stairmaster

I did 20 minutes on the Stairmaster at the swanky gym today.

A flashback

Since I've been maintaining my weight for the last couple of years, I no longer experience the shock of how differently I am treated.

Being "normal" size is, indeed, the new "normal."

Today, though, I had a definite flashback, a flashback of the discombobulation I first felt when I got under 200 pounds and which seemed to intensify with every five pounds, with every dress size.

I spent a lot of time at the ice rink in 2005 and 2006 when my girls got really into skating. You see a lot of the same people when you're a rink regular. I would check in with the same woman almost every time. We'd buy a snack from the same guy at the snack bar whenever we bought one.

I saw those people again today, as my two younger kids are taking figure skating for the next 10 weeks.

Neither one recognized me, of course.

And, I had a dramatically different customer service experience with both of them.

The snack-bar guy was always pleasant to me, even when I was heavy, and he'd loan me his Spanish-language newspaper.

Today, he called me "sweetie" -- a first. And he looked at me differently. In general, being looked at differently is something I do enjoy, of course. Being seen as a woman again is one of the non-health-related perks of losing weight.

It is still a bit jarring when I have a relationship, no matter how small, and I see how it has shifted, solely based on my shifted appearance.

I had never seen the check-in lady smile. She, also, used to be civil enough. She struck me as sort of intense and busy. She was courteous, but not particularly friendly, in the past.

Today, though, I got a big smile.

I do understand. Really. At the same time, it is still a bit weird to me.

Devout

Not getting sucked into stupid computer games has made me a bit more efficient so far this Lent.

I definitely go in streaks with time-wasting behavior, and having a religious reason to avoid those things has been a good thing.

My diet definitely has a religious quality, and I think that's one thing I like about it. It's not that it has a spiritual aspect, so much as it has certain inflexible rules.

I've noticed that many people, even those who don't have a faith, do indeed have their own rules, oftentimes rules that they have developed for their own comfort, rules that make them feel safe.

There's a certain safety and freedom in rules for me. There's also the phenomenon that once you've broken a rule it becomes that much harder to follow it again.

There are certain food items that I have eaten (not sugar, wheat or flour) that I shouldn't have, and it is that much harder to resist them now.