Slow week

Paul came running with me, as I got a late start, and it was dark. He doesn't run, but he walks fast, and sometimes I jog along beside him at his speed. I'm all about getting the heart rate up more than covering a lot of distance.

It wasn't a great run. I was hoping to go at least 90 minutes, but I wasn't feeling great. My vertigo has been acting up all day, and I probably should've stayed home -- but it's fine when I'm running. I got an hour.

I finished with only 180 minutes of running this week. I did get the Pilates class and biking and weight work in as well.

Food nightmare

I had a nightmare I was eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

It wasn't the kind of dream that came out of any longing to eat a peanut butter sandwich as much as the fact that Paul and I had been jokingly arguing about peanut butter sandwich-making technique. (I advocate thin layers of peanut butter on both slices, so as to avoid jelly soaking into the bread. He thinks that is unnecessarily and uncharacteristically fastidious of me. The kids, of course, have been indoctrinated into my way.)

Anyway, those kinds of dreams are always surprisingly upsetting.

Bicycling

The stationary recumbent bicycle was a nice way of mixing things up. It was a lot more boring than running, since it was inside -- but, I had the iPod, so that helped. I could see reading on that bike as well. I didn't want to push too hard, as I haven't biked in a while, so I just did 35 minutes.

Pilates yesterday was interesting, as a more advanced student attended the class, and so we learned (weird) things we hadn't before, including bizarre tricks with the rings that exercise balls usually sit on.

11 pounds

Here is the online calculator for figuring BMI (body-mass index).

I got real excited this summer when my BMI got to the point where I was no longer labeled "obese." I switched into the "overweight" category.

At this point, I have 11 pounds before I am "normal weight." Of course, it could easily take me six months to get there.

I don't have a "goal weight." I do know that I want to be below that magical line of "normal weight."

Cross training

I'm trying the stationary bicycle today. I'd rather run, of course. But I need to work different muscles.

Training food

I'm a bit torn about something.

All these books I'm reading on running talk about nutrition in a way that's just not going to work for me. It's too carb-centric. I eat plenty of carbs, but they're never simple and there's always a lot of protein with them as well.

Tiffany, who now uses "L.A.'s Skinny Coach" as her calling card, but I know her as much as an old friend, likes to quote something I said once early on the plan:

"I'd rather cut off my right arm than eat lasagna."

That's how strongly I feel about staying on plan. I know it sounds extreme and crazy, but I -- finally! -- found something that works. So I'm not going to mess with it. I'm just not going to drink Gatorade or eat gels or carb load with spaghetti dinners.

Running is not going to be my excuse, my rationalization for going off plan. I frankly don't know how I'd handle messing with my food, so it's just non-negotiable.

What I'm leaning toward doing is simply presuming that I won't be optimizing my athletic performance. And that's OK. It's not like I'm trying out for the Olympics or something.

There are portable, on-plan meals I could make and have ready for my longer-distance runs when the glycogen stores have plummeted.

That might be the way to go.

Running dream

I dreamed about running last night.

In it, I went fast and it was effortless.

This morning, I ran -- much slower and with more effort, although a lot less than in the past, of course. I was a good 30 minutes in when I realized that I was running With My Mouth Closed. I could get enough air just breathing normally, just as I sit here typing now, through my nose. Which I can barely believe myself.

I did 60 minutes and got to measure distance today. It was 5.625 miles.

Marathons, the future & me

A few people have accused me of stealth training for a marathon. There's one coming up in L.A. at the end of May and another in San Diego.

I'm not doing any May marathons, though.

I am looking ahead into something later in the year when I will have been running more than a year and when the weather is cooler. I also want to get a bit more weight off my knees before I train any more intensely.

I need to be spending more time in other areas, like weight work in order to increase my sluggish metabolism, but I tend to fall back to running because I -- surprisingly -- love it so much. I haven't really given myself time to enjoy weight work, so I sort of dread it. Part of it, of course, is that you like what you're good at. It's not that I'm "good at" running, but I have enough practice that it's comfortable. I feel competent at it, which is completely unusual for me when it comes to athletic pursuits.

I've also thought about doing the marathon in Albuquerque where my mom and brothers are -- but then the altitude would be an issue.

Another plan for the next few months is to learn to swim better. I'm in good enough cardiovascular shape right now that I think it'll be easier to improve my technique, which is sorely lacking. After that -- surfing!

In the meantime, a friend and I are planning to learn to row, which I'm hoping will help my arms, shoulders and core.

Personality changes

A few years ago, one of my acquaintances lost a ton of weight on a raw food, vegan diet.

Before, she was super-sweet and kind. She was smiley and helpful.

Afterwards, even Paul noticed quite a dramatic change. Once, she ran across the room at a party to angrily dispute something he'd said. She was bony -- and grumpy.

That's one thing I worry about a little. How much has/will my personality change? My weight gain corresponded with my becoming a mother, and I definitely softened with motherhood. Or was it purely the weight gain that softened me, an unconscious recognition of how I had to be nicer when I was fatter?

I occasionally see little glimpses -- now -- of the arrogance of my youth.

Doing the Right Thing is important to me in big ways. So I do Good Girl things like make sure I don't just drive off when I scuff some guy's poorly and illegally parked Lexus with a rubber part of the van.

In little ways, though, I can slip. I let the snark out a bit more.

Paul says my personality hasn't changed with him, although I'm undoubtedly more playful. My brothers think I'm sillier, and I get to hear the off-color stories more than I did before. Tiffany says I'm "mouthier."

I am hoping that the major changes have already occurred.

Tiffany's new incredibly wonderful website

It's here.

There's a lot of great info here, as well as lovely pics of Tiffany. I'm also pictured near the bottom in a photo taken after Pilates a couple of weeks ago.

Injuries

My running injuries, so far:

1) A couple of black toenails. Resolved with new shoes.

2) Shooting pain in non-muscular tissue. Also resolved with better equipment.

3) Exacerbation of my vertigo. Not resolved yet, but, happily, not a problem during runs.

A few years ago, I felt the room spinning just from rolling over in bed. I went to the doctor about it, and he pronounced it "benign positional vertigo." It is caused by small pieces of the inner ear flaking off and messing up the signals the brain gets regarding balance. I'm pretty young to get it, and I've lived a really clean life (one suspected cause is excess drug use), so who knows why it started happening.

I suspect the running has kicked in the current small episode, but maybe I'm blaming running unfairly.

Regardless, I've been remarkably lucky -- no significant running injuries.

Finally -- a good run!

Yes, I've pretty much been slacking on the running. I did too much social stuff on the weekend.

Then, Monday, I went out there, but it was 10:30 and sunny and I'm a huge heat wimp. Plus, then I got a call from the insurance adjuster over the super-minor accident I was involved with -- right in the middle of the run. So, I ended up getting in only about 20 minutes. For general wussiness reasons.

Today, I was out by 7:30, and I got my hour in.

Also, new music helped. I put M.I.A.'s latest album on the iPod, and I highly recommend it.

Weighing infrequently

It's a good thing, considering how slowly I lose weight, that I don't get on the scale very often.

Weighing every 28 days is a big part of Tiffany's plan. At first, I thought it was really stupid. Now, I think it's genius.

Look at the most recent month. I ate like I eat (no sugar, no wheat, no flour -- and portion controlled) and ran for an average of 25 miles a week.

And lost two pounds.

I can't imagine how discouraging that would've felt if I were weighing myself every day. I'd need to see more immediate results or else would feel frustrated and deprived. Been there, done that.

But, now, I don't think about it all that much. I'm not changing the way I eat for anything. I'd love to be on maintenance, but maintenance won't mean any significant difference in what I'm doing right now.

So, I'm just going with the flow.

P.S. to the weigh-in

After today's weigh-in, I asked Paul to get on the scale. I finally weigh about 10 pounds less than he does.

I hated it when I knew I weighed more than he did, particularly since he's so much taller.

Day 532 -- weigh-in

I got weighed and measured today.

Today's weight: 165.

That means I'm two pounds down from last weigh-in. It also means, according to Tiffany, I am the slowest loser ever.

I lost 1.5 inches from my chest, which explains the need to reconfigure my running hardware.

I also lost 1/2 inch from my waist. More would've been nice, but I wasn't really expecting more.

Usually, I weigh on an empty stomach. Today, I weighed having eaten breakfast *and* lunch -- so it's not a complete apples-to-apples weigh-in, although it's probably not off by much.