Yawn

Nothing is more boring that reading about someone else's workout, so forgive me. Today, while my girls were in their capoeira class, I did a run around a nearby park. I'm trying to be careful. There's nothing more fun than running hard and fast, particularly since I literally wasn't able to for years, but I'm doing a bit of a slow shuffle so I don't hurt myself.

Settling down

I really feel as though some of the issues that were plaguing me this summer no longer hold their sway. 

I'm not getting hit on at the grocery store anymore. Of course, it could be the general economic malaise that has everyone down and less frisky. Or I could have grown up and learned to act properly. Dressing up paradoxically also seems to help. I've had the most weirdness when I'm makeup-free and dressed down or in workout clothes.

Breasts

Yes, I talk/write about my breasts a lot.

It's partially because they are the proverbial elephant(s) in the room. They've always been cartoonishly large, and they look that much more so when I'm closer to ideal weight. They're definitely a big reason I get so much more attention when I'm thinner. Armchair psychologists sometimes speculate that they're the reason I was happy to stay fat for so long.

I saw an old friend last weekend and her comment on my weight loss was this: "You sure haven't lost anything on top, have you?" 

Thanks.

I get a little irritated when it comes up in mixed company, though, but sometimes I just go with it.  I often turn them into a punch line. It always cuts the tension in a group of guys. Or a group of women. With mixed groups, it doesn't play the same way.

One great thing about having children has been how I've been able to use them to nourish my babies. In the past, all they were good for was making it difficult for me to exercise, attracting all the wrong kinds of men and scaring the heck out of others. But, after nursing, I have a newfound appreciation. 

Family matters

Paul is practicing his karate and teaching the kids who want to learn. I'm doing some kicks with him. It's part of his fitness kick.

The kids and I are running together in the mornings. They're starting a program -- marathon kids -- where they'll measure runs of 26.2 miles total over the next few months. They're not going to have any trouble hitting that goal.

More cool things I can do now

1) Run upstairs, late for appointment, in 3-inch heels, without getting winded.

2) Not just touch my toes -- touch my palms to the floor.

3) Impress my kids with my muscles

Flashback

More than anything, losing weight reminds me of going through adolescence again.

Maybe that explains the navel-gazing. I'm not usually this self-absorbed.

It's sort of a good time to be reminded of adolescence, as my oldest boy and girl are approaching it.

When I was 12, I used to run the stadium steps at the local ballpark, which I had access to because my dad worked there.

When I was 13, I was suddenly self-conscious. I didn't want to do it anymore, as I was hyper-aware of real and imagined eyes upon me.

Losing weight has the same effect. Some of it is undoubtedly in my head, but some of it is related to the reality of the fact that I am no longer invisible.

Adolescents are becoming aware of the same kind of thing as well. I have so much more empathy than I think I would've without this visceral reminder.

Curves

I joined Curves about a year ago -- when I first started the eating plan.

It was about my speed. I'd lift little weights and push the hydraulic equipment, getting myself out of breath in the process.

I went today for the first time in months, and I had to really push to get a semi-decent workout in. The owner of the gym where I used to go told me, "You're too young for Curves." He was doing the butt-kissing-gym-owner routine; now, however, he's right. Maybe not too young, but I've definitely surpassed the level of fitness.

Humility

OK, I ordered this great dress online in Size XXL, but it's only a 14-16. It's way too small in the waist, so I can't zip it, which I thought might happen. Actually fits in the bust, but that gives me more motivation to cut the waist. I'm going to return the dress. 

It's probably just as well, as it was pushing the boundaries of age-impropriety. I could keep it because I know that it'll eventually fit, but I don't want to store that much money in a "It will fit me someday" space in the closet.

Vacation coming up

I'm going to New Mexico to visit my mom and brothers and sister and nieces on Sunday. 

I moved right when I started on the plan; this is going to be a different kind of challenge, as it will be a week away from my kitchen. The place we're staying has a fridge and a microwave, so that'll help. I'll still need to plan a lot. Eating out can be difficult, at least in my favorite kind of New Mexican restaurants, which are heavy on the cheese and corn and sauces with sugar in them. Chinese food is impossible because every recipe has sugar or flour added, in addition to the wheat in the soy sauce. 

Hobos & me

Homeless guys in L.A. always talk to me, particularly when I'm out with my kids. They usually don't ask me directly for money unless I'm alone, though.

It used to be -- "Wow -- Four kids. You're really blessed!"

If I have extra kids, I get: "Are they all yours?" If it's just my four, no one asks that, as all my kids look alike.

One guy said, "I was going to ask you for help, but I can tell you need it more." (This was when my four were all tiny.) Nice try, buddy.

Today, I had a guy I was crossing paths with while my kids toddled behind say, "I can't believe *you* have four kids!" Funny -- and another nice try.

The Family Speaks

Paul says: "You have the 'Kathleen walk' back -- I remember it from when I first met you."

Also: "You look so young and lively." That's an advantage of marrying a somewhat older man. This is really the first time where our age difference is apparent. When we married, he was nearly 43 and looked 30; then, I started looking older with the extra weight.  

12-year-old, as he was on the floor sorting baseball cards and I stepped over him: "Mom, I didn't recognize you for a second. Your legs look so skinny."

10-year-old was watching a commercial for Weight Watchers on TV that says, "Diets don't work." She said: "Tiffany's diet does." (www.elementalyou.com)

Ouch!

OK, I ran only about five minutes total yesterday, but I felt it today. 

The soreness is only in the thigh muscles, though, not the knees or the ankles, so I'm happy about that. Also got nice and sore in the arms from my weight work.

Paul had a worse injury today. About five or six years ago, he banged the heck out of his big toe when he took a spill while making a turn on his bike. The toenail turned black and hasn't grown much since. It fell off today and is a gaping wound.